So the first trailer for the upcoming movie 50 Shades of Grey has aired, and the networks are going bonkers over it. NBC is hyping the heck out of this movie, and it is getting more and more attention as time goes by. I'm sure that by the time it comes out in February of 2015 everybody in America, and probably most of the people in first-world countries will know of this movie.
I personally have not read the book. I don't plan on intending to see the movie. My only thoughts on this movie is that I would like to bankrupt the studios that are producing this film, show them that America has a stronger moral fiber than just allowing Hollywood to shove whatever down our throats all the time. How can we bankrupt a studio you may ask? Well, I have a plan. First, I have a few thoughts on this story that I want to share with you all, and ask you to think about very carefully.
1. What makes this book different from all the other erotic novels that have been published over the years? That is all that 50 Shades of Grey is, 50 Shades of Erotic Garbage and Mind Pornography. By many accounts it is also one of the worst-written books ever. Have you gone online and watched any of the YouTube Videos titled "So-and-So reads 50 Shades of Grey"? My personal favorites are where Ellen Degeneres reads aloud, as well as Pewdiepie. Just hearing some of the lines from the book make you want to cringe. Actor after actor turned down the role of Christian Grey (including Charlie Hunnam, he read a few pages of script and then refused the role, and that's the guy that starred in Pacific Rim. I think we can all agree that movie isn't known for its brilliant, or even average dialogue.) So, why is this book/movie which by all accounts is terrible, become so popular?
2. This book is the one that the Twilight Series was based off of. Just remove the BDSM from 50 Shades of Grey, add vampires and keep the dialogue and voila.
3. This movie will be the first time that a porn is spread so widely in theatres. 50 Shades of Grey is rated R instead of X, as X-rated movies can't be shown in mainstream theatres. This movie will be shown alongside kids movies in theatres, how wonderful that children, teens, and discerning adults will get to see these trailers and movie posters every time they go to the theatre from now until well into next April or May.
4. This isn't a love story. It's an abusive and domineering relationship which by many accounts doesn't accurately reflect normal BDSM culture (if there is such a thing.) It's about a young woman who slowly has her entire life and person controlled by a ridiculously rich and bored older man, who has a two-dimensional personality. It is a slap in the face to all the movies that have come out in the last two years with a strong female lead, including Harry Potter, Divergent, The Hunger Games, and others. Because women really need to be pulled back to the dark ages and be told what to do. The worst part is that the characters don't even learn anything from the relationships, they sink deeper into them and just stay there. Not like Precious or other movies about abusive relationships that teach you how to get out of them, this one basically tells you to go even deeper into the abuse and co-dependancy.
So, a widely-spread porn that inspired Twilight, about abusive an abusive relationship that is horribly written is about to become the most-viewed movie in America. Back to the first question, why is this book so popular?
-It's easy to read
-It appeals to the lowest common denominator
-It doesn't make you think but lets you stay in a stupor while bathing your mind in garbage
-It's an easy way for companies to make porn more socially acceptable.
I know I haven't given a lot of statistics or research on the movie and frankly I don't want to. Go read Matt Walsh's blog on the subject if you want more research. Are you ready to bankrupt some studios with me? Here's how.
Stop talking about this movie, stop accepting the advertisements on it. When it comes out, don't go see it. Don't buy it. Don't give a cent of your money or a second of your time to this awfulness. Talk someone else out of seeing it. Let's do something drastic, by doing nothing about the movie, we can bankrupt the studio that gave the time of day to this film, and show Hollywood that we won't accept this smut in our lives. Who wants to bankrupt Focus Features, Michael Del Luca Productions, and Trigger Street Productions with me? Let's create a little chaos together.
Showing posts with label chaos. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chaos. Show all posts
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Everything Shall Happen at Once
From henceforth today you shall read the rant of the Everythings. Things that clump shall stay clumped, and empty space shall be nothing but open space. Everything shall happen at once, or not at all.
(Law of Everthings chapter 2, section 4.16)
I have decided that the universe is rather lazy, and likes to clump everything together to save effort. Especially along the time-continuum of things. Haven't you noticed that nothing will happen for ages on end, you'll have weekend after weekend free of anything social or even important to do, then suddenly three of your friends will call and invite you to paintballing, hiking, or a show all on the same night. At the same time. You haven't noticed that?
Okay girls, all the single ladies that read my blog. That's at least 3 people, right? Anyway let's talk about dates. How often has this scenario happened? You'll go weeks, months, even years without a date (heck, I went 2.5 years at one stretch) then suddenly you'll get asked out. Not just by one gentleman, but two. If you're lucky, three or four, even a fifth will express interest in you. And all within the same week. Sound familiar? Why does this happen then? I'm not really sure, I have some ideas, but this happens time after time so it's not a coincidence, there's some law actively governing things here.
Don't believe me yet? Well let's move on to pets.
How does this apply you may ask? Well, think about it. You probably went 3-4 years, heck, maybe even a decade without a pet of some sort in your life. Then, you decide to get a bird. Or a dog. A small dog. Suddenly, within 3 months you have become home to a petting zoo that consists of a dog, two cats, several birds, and all the neighbors asking if you can tend THEIR animals on the weekend. After years of petlessness, you are overcome with animals. Something fishy is going on here.
What about friends? It works this way too. You'll move to a new place, or even stay in an old one, and you'll seem to have no friends that can stand being around you. Maybe no one knows you yet, maybe all your friends are busy or can't stand the sight of you and need a break. So you'll go a month or two spending Saturday night lying on the couch and trying to eat potato chips off your chest. Then, you'll either decide you've had enough of couch crumbs or your friends will forget why they were avoiding you and contact will once again be made. You'll have something to do every night of the week, sometimes five or six things and you're swamped. How does this happen?
Here's my explanation. The Law of Everythings clumps things together so that the most action takes place on the fewest amount of days. Don't ask me why, but it's as recurrent as Newton's Law of Gravity. You'd think this law would allow events to be spread out over time so you could handle the most amount possible. Not so.
My explanation has three parts. One, life is like a floodgate. You either shut certain aspects completely out or you become entirely waterlogged with those occurrences. This may be a trick of the mind, but once you become aware of a lack of something in your life, you open yourself up to receiving it. Not the world's fault your life floodgate only has off and full blast.
Second, sometimes you put off some sort of aura or personal bubble that people aren't welcome in. This applies especially to Laws of the Median involving other people. You bounce people off your bubble and then one day without your conscious mind realizing it your psyche carefully flips the reverse switch. Suddenly it's like people haven't seen you before and can't get enough. This would also explain weird trends in popularity like Beiber Fever.
Third explanation is that we suffer from the Baader-Meinhoff Phenomenon on a much larger scale than we realize. This phenomenon explains that there is tons of information in our world. Such a large scale of sensory information that our brains block quite a bit of it out to keep from being overwhelmed. But, once you notice something, like how there is an arrow between the E and the X on the FedEx trucks, you notice this everywhere. Your brain becomes sensitized to the information and you can see the other occurrences of it. This explains the other half of the phenomenon that's not people related, but more you or other thing related. It's actually a rather interesting phenomenon and I recommend reading more on that.
Anyway, the reason for this introspection is that I was offered three different options for the first two weeks of May. Once is that I'm going to watch my aunt Roberta while my Grandma goes to Israel. Two is that I was offered a rather full-time job of working with the PTC (a 6-week run that starts the end of April). Three, I was offered a volunteer opportunity to stage-manage the Farmington summer play, which starts with auditions the first week of May and would require almost full-time attention every evening until the show opened. So, I can only do one of those things adequately. I haven't had a job for three months now, and suddenly there's a possibility for three of them? All starting within 4 days of each other? Yep, that's the Law of the Everythings at work.
Think about it, and I'll bet you can identify things like this right off the bat in your life. Currently this law is quite frustrating to me, although at other times it can be awesome. Anyway, enjoy the rest of your day and see if you can find a FedEx truck just for kicks.
(Law of Everthings chapter 2, section 4.16)
 |
| If Chaos was a picture, this is what my brain would look like. |
I have decided that the universe is rather lazy, and likes to clump everything together to save effort. Especially along the time-continuum of things. Haven't you noticed that nothing will happen for ages on end, you'll have weekend after weekend free of anything social or even important to do, then suddenly three of your friends will call and invite you to paintballing, hiking, or a show all on the same night. At the same time. You haven't noticed that?
Okay girls, all the single ladies that read my blog. That's at least 3 people, right? Anyway let's talk about dates. How often has this scenario happened? You'll go weeks, months, even years without a date (heck, I went 2.5 years at one stretch) then suddenly you'll get asked out. Not just by one gentleman, but two. If you're lucky, three or four, even a fifth will express interest in you. And all within the same week. Sound familiar? Why does this happen then? I'm not really sure, I have some ideas, but this happens time after time so it's not a coincidence, there's some law actively governing things here.
Don't believe me yet? Well let's move on to pets.
How does this apply you may ask? Well, think about it. You probably went 3-4 years, heck, maybe even a decade without a pet of some sort in your life. Then, you decide to get a bird. Or a dog. A small dog. Suddenly, within 3 months you have become home to a petting zoo that consists of a dog, two cats, several birds, and all the neighbors asking if you can tend THEIR animals on the weekend. After years of petlessness, you are overcome with animals. Something fishy is going on here.
What about friends? It works this way too. You'll move to a new place, or even stay in an old one, and you'll seem to have no friends that can stand being around you. Maybe no one knows you yet, maybe all your friends are busy or can't stand the sight of you and need a break. So you'll go a month or two spending Saturday night lying on the couch and trying to eat potato chips off your chest. Then, you'll either decide you've had enough of couch crumbs or your friends will forget why they were avoiding you and contact will once again be made. You'll have something to do every night of the week, sometimes five or six things and you're swamped. How does this happen?
Here's my explanation. The Law of Everythings clumps things together so that the most action takes place on the fewest amount of days. Don't ask me why, but it's as recurrent as Newton's Law of Gravity. You'd think this law would allow events to be spread out over time so you could handle the most amount possible. Not so.
My explanation has three parts. One, life is like a floodgate. You either shut certain aspects completely out or you become entirely waterlogged with those occurrences. This may be a trick of the mind, but once you become aware of a lack of something in your life, you open yourself up to receiving it. Not the world's fault your life floodgate only has off and full blast.
Second, sometimes you put off some sort of aura or personal bubble that people aren't welcome in. This applies especially to Laws of the Median involving other people. You bounce people off your bubble and then one day without your conscious mind realizing it your psyche carefully flips the reverse switch. Suddenly it's like people haven't seen you before and can't get enough. This would also explain weird trends in popularity like Beiber Fever.
Third explanation is that we suffer from the Baader-Meinhoff Phenomenon on a much larger scale than we realize. This phenomenon explains that there is tons of information in our world. Such a large scale of sensory information that our brains block quite a bit of it out to keep from being overwhelmed. But, once you notice something, like how there is an arrow between the E and the X on the FedEx trucks, you notice this everywhere. Your brain becomes sensitized to the information and you can see the other occurrences of it. This explains the other half of the phenomenon that's not people related, but more you or other thing related. It's actually a rather interesting phenomenon and I recommend reading more on that.
Anyway, the reason for this introspection is that I was offered three different options for the first two weeks of May. Once is that I'm going to watch my aunt Roberta while my Grandma goes to Israel. Two is that I was offered a rather full-time job of working with the PTC (a 6-week run that starts the end of April). Three, I was offered a volunteer opportunity to stage-manage the Farmington summer play, which starts with auditions the first week of May and would require almost full-time attention every evening until the show opened. So, I can only do one of those things adequately. I haven't had a job for three months now, and suddenly there's a possibility for three of them? All starting within 4 days of each other? Yep, that's the Law of the Everythings at work.
Think about it, and I'll bet you can identify things like this right off the bat in your life. Currently this law is quite frustrating to me, although at other times it can be awesome. Anyway, enjoy the rest of your day and see if you can find a FedEx truck just for kicks.
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