Eyebrows, or Lack Thereof

So I decided that I was going to get my eyebrows waxed a month ago. I'd never had it done and the girls who did get theirs waxed always looked so polished and gorgeous. So, I took an empty slot with a friend who is going through beauty school. My hair had been quite dry lately due to suddenly deciding to dye it dark and then strip all the color back out, so I also went for a deep conditioning treatment.

The hair treatment was wonderful, I felt like a freaking movie star. I got my hair washed and treated and styled, it was so lovely and my hair could now be the envy of a supermodel mermaid. Look them up, they do exist. Plus I was taught a new way to style my bangs. Life could not be better on that front. On the other side of my head though, it was a different story.

First, the soothing warm wax was applied, and then she gently, if quite firmly, ripped up half my eyebrow hair.
"Dear Lord what have I done?!?!?!!!"
Let me give you a little background. Up until this point I had thought that I had slightly patchy, if rather nice brows. The right one was a little stubby but my brows were nothing to sneeze at. With the new polished but thick brow fashion hitting a high point, I thought a little polishing would slide me right to brow fame. How wrong was I.

Looking at the aftermath in the mirror it wasn't too terrible. A little redness, especially just under the brow, mostly nice shape. A little thin but I could deal. My unfortunately stubby right brow though was now much stubbier. Also my eyebrows seemed farther apart than normal. I didn't understand how, "Oh, now they match perfectly" translated into one long and one short brow. The worst was yet to come though.

That night the area underneath my eyebrows was still rather red, especially in two strips basically right in the middle of the area between the lid and the brow. I applied a cold washcloth, a little neosporin and went to bed. Ah, the last night of lovely dreams. In the morning, two angry red strips stared back at me like second eyebrows that would have looked better on Satan. Apparently my lovely, learning friend had waxed the skin right off, putting me into slight abrasion mode.

So for the next week I fielded questions about my poor eyebrows and dealt with the weird peeling and redness as best I could. My eyebrows looked a little strange but with asymmetrical bangs the asymmetrical brows were not noticeable.

After such a debacle you'd think I would go to a different stylist or at least forgo the brow waxing again. That's where you would be wrong my friend. Four weeks later I decided to repeat the experience.

I thought I would be smart though and said, "please just clean them up, no shaping this time." From what I had read on the internets, this would direct my stylist to remove the weird loose hairs between my eyes and wherever else weird loose hairs grow. On your face. Around your brows. Specifically weird loose brow hairs. Ha, I did not know the enthusiasm that medium-thick, partially regrown brows could release in young stylists.

She showed me the mirror and I nearly screamed "Holy Castiel what are those things?!!!" I now had one upside-down Nike symbol and one kind of nice but definitely shorter and thinner caterpillar. The worst part was, those familiar red second brows were back. I very nicely instead decided to concentrate on what she was doing to my hair. She did a fabulous job, if not for my eyebrows I would have been the the most gorgeous girl in leggings walking down the streets between 5th and 6th south that day. As it was, I couldn't tell if the stares were for my hair, my uneven brows, my second angry brows, or my voluptuous booty. Hey, you're the internet, you can imagine me having a gorgeous booty.

When later close looks in the mirror showed that in certain light my eyes looked bald, (thanks blonde ancestors), I freaked out. Frantic searches of the internet revealed that it could take 2-3 months for full regrowth, and that only expensive brow pencils would fix them to look something close to normal. Asymmetrical bangs could also come to the rescue as well. The stupid second eyebrows were also dramatically different. At least one wasn't as bad as the other. The worse one though was twice as red. Pathetic, I know. I vow though, to never get my brows waxed again. Did just fine on my own with tweezing before, don't need it now. My poor eyebrows.

If you see Satan, please tell him I found his brows. They are on my face. Also if you know anything about eyebrow wigs...let's just say I might be interested.

The Art of Mismatched Socks

I am an avid sock mismatch-er. A sock connoisseur if you will. I regularly purchase packs of brightly colored socks and mismatch them on purpose to create a fashion statement of sorts. It's a bit more subtle than wearing red shoes, and despite what you may think it does take a little effort. Perhaps even more effort than actually matching socks.

Mismatching like a Boss

You see, wearing mismatched socks requires finesse and following of certain rules. Occasionally I run into people who see my brightly colored, unmatched feet and exclaim; "You don't match your socks? Me neither!" They then point to their own feet, clad in two different white Hanes brand socks, proving to me that as well as not knowing how to properly mismatch socks, they also have a tenuous grasp of the English language.

This person deserves a trophy for the skulls and the proper mismatch

So as there seems to be confusion on how to mismatch socks, let me spell it out for you.

1. It is not, and never will be, 'cool' to mismatch your regular or 'dress' socks.

NO!

You see, this is laziness. This is what gives true sock mismatchers a bad name. If the sock is meant to be matched, for heaven's sake please match it! This is as bad as wearing black and navy blue together, purple pants and an orange belt, or any kind of non-toe socks with flip-flops.

Never, EVER, try to mix and match these type of socks

It just doesn't work. So, for the sake of the fashion world and to prevent your date from thinking you're an idiot, match the socks that are meant to be matched!!!!!

2. Any socks that you wear should always be of the same style.

Um, no.

Definitely no!

Never attempt to mismatch between styles, this is the ultimate in laziness. If this is a difficulty for you, simply start purchasing only one style of socks (i.e. only ankle socks) and with time the issue will take care of itself. Or you could just organize your sock drawer by style. A little effort goes a long way.

Points for creativity, but NO.

Some people do look at my feet and exclaim, "Your socks don't match!? Isn't that uncomfortable? My feet could never stand it!" Thing is, neither could my feet. I prefer them to feel the same. Wear the same style of socks and work on your observational skillz. This isn't something only Sherlock would notice, it's something anyone with eyes can see.

3. Try to match colors or patterns. 

Yes! Stripes and polka dots of the same color on a matching background. Yes!

If there is some similarity between the socks, this speaks to a conscious choice. It looks better on your feet, and those people with understanding see your feet and think, They didn't match their socks! That looks pretty neat actually....

Mismatching with class

Stores have caught on to this fad and in an effort to help with proper sock mismatching, now sell socks that purposefully mismatch. These are usually simple mismatches that are of alternating colors in the same patterns, but they know how to do it. If you're confused, just go to a store, purchase a pack of non-matching socks, and ONLY wear the socks together that come from the pack. It'll be okay and you'll look like a mismatch newb but you'll be getting there.

4. Try choosing socks of the same style, in solid colors that complement each other

Any of these can be combined with the other, it works!

This is called Color Blocking. Abercrombie & Fitch does it all the time. As much as I don't like them for their fat people policy, you have to agree that their color methods are quite fantastic. The neon matches are my favorite. I've had three boyfriends that have been colorblind, one of whom was quite adverse to any type of sock mismatches due to his obsessive-compulsive qualities. So, as neon colors were hard for him to focus on and tell exact colors, I would wear my brightest neon socks in different colors. To him they matched, and for me, it was a small rebellion. (And yes, that did factor in to why we are no longer together, the obsessiveness I mean.)

5. Have fun with it!

Bright and yet subtle. Brilliant!

Make your socks a focal point of your outfit. Make sure people notice them! After all, you've taken the time to ensure that you are correctly mismatching them. Show people your feet fashion and be bold!

Gorgeous!

How to Curl your Eyelashes

This is some very important information that you will need the rest of your life. This is How to Curl your Eyelashes. Please pay attention, because what you read in the next two minutes will be used daily for years, but if you don't learn this, then you will just have to suffer.



To Curl Your Eyelashes
Get a good curler. Seriously, don't go for the most expensive one, but for heaven's sake your eyelashes sake, don't get the cheapo dollar store version. Get a nice one, like the Maybeline or Covergirl eyelash curler with soft rubber edging.

Before applying mascara: take the curler and carefully maneuver your eyelashes between the crimping ends. Go  about 0.1 inches out from your lid, and close the curler firmly. If you pinch your lid, you're too close to the skin and may be pulling out valuable eyelashes. Hold for 10 seconds, then move a little further out and do it again, and again until you have done the length of your upper lashes. Do the right side too (how did I know you did the left side first? Because I'm psychic, duh). You can curl the bottom lashes if you want, just flip the curler around and do the same. Most of us won't need to do this because A. Our lower lashes already lay down along the lid or B. The lower lashes are so short we probably won't be mascaraing them anyway

DON'T curl your lashes after applying mascara. This is popular to do, but it can break your lashes, and clump them together. Mostly it will break your lashes and get your curler all makeupy, and who wants a sticky black curler?

Now, take your mascara, and swiping from the bottom root of your lash to the top, apply the mascara in long, even strokes. Do the top of the lashes, now do the underside again for good measure. Dip the mascara brush once, without pumping, then do the other side. Touch up the outer corners and the bottom lashes for good measure. DONE! You look Fabulous! You can apply as much or as little mascara as you want for different looks, just be sure to Curl Before Mascara. If you remember that rule, then your life is changed forever, and you will be blessed by the Eyelash Fairy!

Enjoy those super-long beautiful lashes!

Steampunk

I have happily, if by accident discovered the genre of STEAMPUNK. What is this you may ask? Well, it’s a type of fashion and media that describes a setting where steam power is still widely used, usually Victorian Britain or the Wild West  United States, and it incorporates elements of science fiction or fantasy. I think the best term to describe it is ‘retro-futuristic’.

Steampunk is a highly detailed genre that relies on machines and descriptions of a world where gears, leather, and sometimes bulky but always highly detailed inventions are key. Think wooden barrels with gears, goggles, lighter-than-air airships, digitally mechanical devices, modern technology adapted with springs and steam, all attached to a Victorian feel.

I stumbled on this genre by chance, but it's always been lurking around the corners of my vision. Think movies such as Sherlock Holmes (2010 and 2011), Treasure Planet, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and books such as H.G. Well's 'The Time Machine', and Jules Vernes '20,000 Leagues Under the Sea'. I was actually doing research on a book I'm currently trying to write, and I found a name and a thriving sub-culture, complete with pictures and dedicated fans!

 Here’s some of my favorite pictures from the Steampunk genre.

Isn't this just the coolest watch ever!

This girl went to a Dragon Con event dressed as a Steampunk Fairy, you can see the mechanical wings behind her!

 This is a tricyle that my brother would probably get a kick out of, and invent himself if he got the chance!

 

Of course, a classic Victorian guy costume, streamlined for steampunk fashionistas.

And these shoes, awesome!