A Year of Dates

My To-Do List of Dates

How all couples should meet

For quite some time now I've run into this problem. What to do on the date upon which I'm about to embark? Now dates can be simple, complex, long, or short, but they all have one thing in common. Two people going out in order to get to know each other better. Whether you've been on one date or a million, this is always important. All too often, I run into the trap of, "What do ya wanna do?" "I don't know whadda you wanna do? "I don't know...let's do something!"



So, in hopes of avoiding the dreaded trap, I have compiled my rather lengthy list of date ideas. This is the 'bucket list' of dates, I want to do all of these someday. My goal in coming up with the ideas was simple, fun, and inexpensive. Now, this has been tailored to those who live in the Salt Lake area, but you can easily adapt the specific places I've mentioned (Asylum 49 for your fav local haunted house for example) and you'll have more dates than you can sneeze at. Without further ado, here they are!

1. Picnic in the park
2. Walk Gateway mall and run through the fountain
3. Try all the frozen yogurt stores nearby and pick a favorite.
4. Sneak into Lagoon using the resident pass just to ride the Superman. (My name for the one that drops you from 400 feet in a huge swing.)
5. Explore that old, creepy barn. At night. And take pictures.
6. Make out in the middle of the mall.
7. Each of you compile a CD of fav songs and then listen to them together.
8. Go to library together and pick out a book for the other person to read.
9. Climb to flag on mountain.
10. Go hot-tubbing, preferably somewhere you're not supposed to, like a hotel you didn't check in at.
11. Go waterskiing.
12. Weekend trip to Yellowstone or Jackson Hole or wherever you can get in 8 hrs of driving.
13. Go to a store, pick out outfits for each other, try them on. Laugh.
14. Try out the Twilight Concert Series in Salt Lake, just to laugh at the bands.
15. Write a short story one evening, switching off each paragraph with the other person.
16. Quiet dinner and movie at the house, but don't really watch the movie.
17. Sneak into the others workplace and kidnap them for 5 minutes to kiss in a closet.
18. Film a Vine together.
19. Walk around the downtown and take pictures of the graffiti.
20. Take the other person to your place of work and show them off.
21. Play video games.
22. Make a ridiculous music video together.
23. Go apartment shopping, even if neither of you has any interest in moving.
24. Try that crazy dance club.
25. Go to a bar with live music and order super fruity drinks.
26. Pretty much any excuse to kiss, hold hands, or make out. Find the excuses.
27. Make costumes together.
28. TP one of your arch-enemies houses.
29. Spend the evening looking up how to say, "I love you" in 20 different languages.
30. Have a nerf-gun fight. Or water balloon fight.
31. Go swimming. Preferably where neither of you have been.
32. Speaking of that, go wading in the Tempe square reflecting pool.
33. Go to Idaho just to go horseback riding.
34. Trampoline park anyone?
35. Paintball with friends, but ditch the friends on the way home.
36. Sneak into a theatre just to hold impromptu performances for each other.
37. Make your fav dinner for them.
38. Get some friends and a large, dark building and play sardines. (Reverse of hide-and-go seek. One person hides, everyone goes to find them and once you find them, you hide with them.)
39. Camping.
40. Show up unexpectedly at the other persons house with a random gift, stay only 10 minutes but kiss the whole time.
41. Climb to the top of a random skyscraper just to see what's up there.
42. Give each other a foot massage.
43. Go ice-blocking.
44. Climb a tree.
45. Organize a movie outside.
46. Go sledding.
47. Build an igloo and have a picnic.
48. Go on a hike.
49. Go to Nicklemania (or other and spend the whole time playing 2 person games, or challenging the other person, or just having fun.
50. Fid the weirdest restaurant you can and eat there.
51. Find the closest cheap concert and go, no matter the band.
52. Go to a museum, imitate the displays and take pictures.
53. Explore a big old, or big new library.
54. Find a farmer's market and pretend to be an old Russian married couple. Confuse the heck out of everyone you meet.
55. Go rock-climbing.
56. Find a weird TV show on Netflix and watch an episode. Write a review online.
57. Find a really old, dumb movie and riff-trax it. (As in, heckle.)
58. Go through a haunted house just to hang on tight to each other. (Asylum 49, Castle of Chaos, Fear Factory, or the best one, Nightmare on 13th)
59. Make up a dance routine to your song together, pretend you're on Dancing With the Stars.
60. Karaoke night.
61. Take a horse-carriage ride.

There, more than a year's worth of ideas, even if you do more than one a week on occasion. Dating is important, whether you're brand-new to the scene or married 50 years. The worst thing you can do is get stuck in a rut. I once dated a guy that only wanted to sit on his couch and stare at the wall while he fell asleep. AFTER I'd driven to his house, at his request, because..... he didn't have any ideas? Still confused as to why I did that. Needless to say, Mr. Boring didn't last long in the romantic scene of my life.

Have some give and take, but don't say no to something just because it seems weird or hard or you've never done it before. Try that sushi, you may even like it. At the very least you'll say, "Well, I'm doing something that I didn't do yesterday." That's what life's really about, finding the adventure. Have fun dating! And whatever you do, don't feed the homeless on 400 South, they bite.

When One Door Closes....

     There was once a girl who lived in the dark. She spent her days searching through hallways looking for a door to go through. Through most doors were more hallways, but sometimes she would find a room filled with light. She was searching for light now, hoping to bring it into her world.
    One day she saw a light in the far distance, and began walking to it. She soon saw an open door. It was

gorgeous, full of light, possibilities, opportunities, and had the most intricate and beautiful designs to decorate it. She began running, she didn't want to miss this door. When she got there, gate keeper asked for her identification. The girl shook her head, puzzled that this particular door needed identification.
     The gate keeper became angry, asking her if she had even bothered to read the signs. The girl looked around the dark hallway. The hall was long and empty, no windows, signs, light, or even doors other than the one that she was standing in front of. She turned back to the gate keeper and tried to point this out. There are no signs or instructions for this door, I only saw the light coming through. The gate keeper shook his head again, obviously thinking the girl was dumb and trying to slip through where she wasn't wanted. The gorgeous door began to shut. As the light streaming through the doorway dimmed the girl threw her weight against it, not wanting to be left in the dark again, but she wasn't strong enough and the door closed.
    The girl stood in front of the beautiful door for a short time. She couldn't see it but she could still feel the designs under her fingertips, and possibilities still drifted like smoke from the crack underneath. You can't catch a possibility though, so she finally turned away, back to the dark. The girl felt in her pocket for her last remnant of initiative. There wasn't much left, but she couldn't see the way without light so she lit it up. The light sputtered softly and she began to slowly make her way back down the long hall.

     As she walked in the dark, with her initiative slowly burning away, a few tears began to fall. It isn't fair, I'm sure I could have gotten identification if the gate keeper had just waited. Another rebellious thought popped up, No one wants to give me a pass to their doors, I'm going to be stuck in the dark forever. The dark hallway that she had been so joyfully running down before now seemed oppressive, and she began to shiver in the dark.
     Finally, after hours of walking and with the remains of her initiative burning the tips of her fingers, she arrived at her waiting place. The girl was quite familiar with this place, she spent most of her time here. She blew out the initiative and tucked it back in her pocket. The waiting place had its own rather eerie glow. Lined around the walls of the waiting place were thousands of doors and hallways. Many were quite familiar to her, she had knocked upon most at one time or another. Few doors ever opened, but sometimes you were able to find a key.
     There was one hallway that she traveled down regularly and she did so now. This hallway was one she had opened for herself using hard work. Hard work was finite but it did get you places. There were a few closed windows that let in a little light, and if the girl peeked through she could see opportunities dancing. She didn't have the key to get in though, so she kept walking.
     This hallway was one she'd been working on for a particularly long time. Every so often there were doors that she had found the keys for, making the hallway longer and longer. With every door she opened, she found a small nugget of knowledge on the other side. These were valuable, and could be traded with gate keepers to enter particular doors. Right now she was working on a collection.
    The girl got to the last door and began once again to search in the dark. When she found the key she shouted with triumph and fitted into the last door. The door swung open, but instead of a room with light that she had expected, it was another dark room. She could faintly make out six more doors, branching out from this one. The girl realized she hadn't been anywhere close to completing this journey, and every door that she had spent hard work to open had only given her more locked doors. She stared into the darkness, and then closed the door firmly and marched back down the hall.
     Back at the waiting place the girl sat alone in the dark. There was no one around, and she was out of ideas. Ideas were like flares, lighting up the waiting place and would lead right up to doors. Those doors could usually be opened with a little effort, but without any ideas the girl couldn't see where to go. Right now she was as close as she could get to a rather plain door. It wasn't open now, but there was a timer on the door and the countdown said it would open soon. She hoped it would anyway, sometimes these timers were wrong and the door would never open. She didn't know if there was a dark hallway or a light room behind this door, but right now without initiative, ideas, enough knowledge, or other resources, she didn't know what else to do. So, she waited.

     After a time she heard someone walking up. The girl didn't know who it was, people rarely visited her here in the dark. Most of them had their own rooms that were filled with light, even her best friend was busy exploring hallways that the girl didn't have enough knowledge to pay to get into. The person came up beside her, paused, and to the girl's surprise, sat down.
     Are you waiting for this door too? The girl asked? She hoped this person wasn't, but she did want to be polite. Maybe this stranger had some ideas she could borrow.
    A voice laughed. It was a nice laugh. I'm not really interested in this door, I came to see you instead.
    The girl was puzzled at this. Why would you come to see me? I don't know you.
    You know who I am, you've just forgotten. The voice did sound familiar, but she couldn't place it, especially with too little light to see their face. I came to see if you understand how this place works.
    The girl laughed, a little bitter at this. Of course I understand how this works. I look for an open door, or a key, and then I open more doors. Sometimes I find a door filled with light, but most of the time it's just more darkness. I can pay with knowledge to get in to some doors, and others have special requirements, but most of the time I have to apply hard work and even then not all the doors open. 
     The voice in the dark seemed saddened by this. You understand some, but don't you realize that whenever a door closes, another one opens?
     I have never seen that happen. The girl replied, it just doesn't work that way for me. 
     Oh but it does, I saw you trying to get into the beautiful door, and wanted to make sure you got to the other one that was open for you.
     There's another door for me? I hurt my hands trying to keep the beautiful door open, and burned my fingers getting back here. I definitely didn't see another open door the entire time. The girl was beginning to get frustrated  who did this strange person with a familiar voice think she was? She wasn't blind or stupid, she worked hard to get what she did have, and doors never opened on their own.
     The voice asked, Did you look over there? There's a big door, even more beautiful than the first that's waiting for you. The girl looked. There was no open door, just several closed ones and long hallways filled with more darkness. There's nothing over there, I've never seen light from that part of my waiting room. 
    She heard a little rustling, then a hand brushed her arm. Here, take these.  She felt something light and metal in her hand, and she looked to see what they were. Glasses? 
     It's Hope, you can see farther with them on. The girl scoffed. I don't need hope, what I need is an open door. The voice replied gently, Just try. So, she took the hope and placed it on her face.
     For a while, everything looked the same, then little details began to pop out. Pathways worn into the floor by hundreds of other feet, details and carvings on the walls and doors around her. The door she was leaning against suddenly had a window inset that she hadn't seen before, and then, right in front of her, there was a door. An open door, streaming light through it. The light was colored, and different from what she had expected, but it was open. And it was beautiful. The girl jumped up, and walked towards the door, hardly able to believe it.
     She remembered the voice and turned back, but there was no one to be seen. Hello? I just wanted to say thank you....No response, but she noticed a piece of paper on the floor, folded around something. She picked it up, and out fell some initiative and something she had never seen before, courage. It was really beautiful, purple and clear, sparkling in the light from the doorway. She gazed at it for a moment before reading the paper.

When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.
Use hope, courage, and initiative to find the doors that are open,
And if you can't find an open door, crawl through a window

P.S. I noticed you were out of initiative so here's a bit more, and some courage to help.

The girl reread the paper, and suddenly she knew who it was she had been talking to. She smiled, then turned and walked through the open door.

You Are What You Think

I've stumbled on something that I think is quite brilliant. It's one of those things people tell you a million times, but until it actually clicks with you it doesn't mean anything. Focusing on the positive will literally change your life. Let me explain:

I can eat it! Om nom nom nom!!!!

Hillary Weeks once did an experiment where she decided to count all the negative thoughts in her life. She did that for a week, and became rather depressed. Go figure. She then decided to count all the positive thoughts she had in her life, and suddenly things were so much better. I've linked the YouTube video so you can see it for yourself; but the point is that what you focus on becomes the center of your life.

Another story. There was once an Indian chief who was speaking with his grandson. He told him, "My heart has two wolves fighting inside me, one is good and the other is evil." The grandson asked, "Who will win?" The chief replied, "Whichever one I feed." I've paraphrased the story, but can you feel the power of that statement? Whichever one I feed. I've heard John Bytheway tell this story, as well as many others, and I cannot believe how it hits me every time I hear it.

In life, we have the power to give credence to either the good or the bad, the positive or the negative in our lives. In my previous post, I talked about this a little, but the negative can overwhelm us if we give it too much power, or even thought. Now, I know I've already gone on about this, but we were having a Relief Society lesson taught by our bishop today and we focused a lot on the power of thoughts. The lesson was on a different, rather personal subject but what I pulled from it is that our thoughts have the power to make or to break us, and if we choose to focus on the negative we bring ourselves down, and on the positive we pull ourselves up.

Here's my personal example. Today I was feeling sorry for myself. You know, the whole no car, no job, no money, can't do anything stuff. Then I had the thought, "This is pathetic, things aren't all bad, I mean, I'm not homeless so I've got to have some good things going for me, right?" Then I started to try and name them. It was actually really hard to pull myself out of the negative rut. I finally got myself thinking, "Okay, I've got a warm room... but it's not mine. No, that's not the point, I've got a warm room to stay in and a soft bed. That's a good thing." After that, it started getting easier. I have a fun class I'm taking, a grandma that loves me, parents that care, a brother that actually calls frequently, a best friend that let me borrow a car, another best friend I can talk to, an improv troupe that I feel welcome in and that I'm making friends with, and job interviews and cool socks and a caring bishop and the list went on from there.

After I started thinking about it, there was so much to be thankful for. It really turned my day around. I could focus on everything that's going wrong right now (no car, job, money, boyfriend, ect) but by focusing on the good my life seems so much more open. The possibilities become endless, and I feel like I can accomplish things. That feeling is more important than anything, because when I'm stuck in a pit of depression I don't want to do or try anything. On the other hand, when I turn that around it's like I've got wings. Life may not be perfect, but it is good. It just depends on which side of it you look at.

BOOOOKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

Random photo that I took of some signs in Florida,
the greenness makes me happy!

So, I’m writing a book! I think I like to start a lot of sentences with so….. Anyway! The working title is called Dreamscapes, and it’s going to be awesome. I’m having a little trouble fleshing out background characters though. All I really seem to want to do is focus on the main characters and their issues, but without side characters you can’t really have fully fleshed main characters, and anyway. My goal is to be mostly done by March 25^th. HA! It’s a lot of work, and I seem to be excellent at procrastinating. I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up, and I think that plays into it a lot. Blah.

SO! If you have any ideas what my characters names should be, let me know! First one to respond gets a sneak peak at my Chapter 1! It’s not actually chapter one, it’s pre-chapter one, but it’ll make you happy. Lol, no one’s going to read this, it’s just echoes in my mind. Hello…… ello…. ello… o…..o…o……. Yep, that’s about it. ANYWAY! Peace all, bu-bye!