Monday, November 4, 2013

That Don't Impress Me Much

So I was out with some friends the other day, and I encountered a social situation that I've never really encountered before. One of the people at this outing is someone that I had previously agreed to go on a date with in the future. On this outing he decided to announce to the group that he and I were going on a date and that he was going to do all these awesome things for me. Borrow an expensive car, roses, yadda yadda. It was uncalled for and I was embarrased. Embarrassed to have my dating life brought up in a group setting, and even more embarrassed at the ego-stroking that went on from the people around him. 

"Wow, that's so awesome, I'd be so impressed." 
"Girl, you better reciprocate because he's going to a lot of trouble."
"This guy must be Batman, he's awesome."

I mean seriously? I could put this in more 'indelicate' terms, but I think that this gets the point across. He started talking about the future date in front of a bunch of people as a way to 'lay claim' and to have his manliness affirmed by a bunch of younger people who obviously couldn't afford things like this. 

It was embarrassing for me, but in a way I'm glad it came up. At least I got a good glimpse at what kind of a person he is. I think what bothered me the most is that everyone thought I should be impressed by this show. Fancy car? Money spent? Whatever. I think it's fine to go to trouble for a date, but to need to have your actions affirmed by everyone else? Talking about it as if I was already taken? Without my permission? No tact and definitely not cool. I hated being put in that situation. 

I've got an idea of what I'm going to do about this, but I'm going to keep that to myself for now. One thing that ran through my head clear and strong though, in the midst of my potential future date patting himself on the back was the lyrics to this Shania Twain song, the best of which lyrics I have included below. 


"That Don't Impress Me Much"

I've known a few guys who thought they were pretty smart
But you've got being right down to an art
You think you're a genius-you drive me up the wall
You're a regular original, a know-it-all
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else

Okay, so you're a rocket scientist
That don't impress me much
So you got the brain but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night
That don't impress me much

You're one of those guys who likes to shine his machine
You make me take off my shoes before you let me get in
I can't believe you kiss your car good night
C'mon baby tell me-you must be jokin', right!

Oh-oo-oh, you think you're special
Oh-oo-oh, you think you're something else

Okay, so you've got a car
That don't impress me much
So you got the moves but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm in the middle of the night

That don't impress me much
You think you're cool but have you got the touch
Don't get me wrong, yeah I think you're alright
But that won't keep me warm on the long, cold, lonely night
That don't impress me much

Okay, so what do you think you're Elvis or something...
Oo-Oh-Oh
That don't impress me much!

Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-No
Alright! Alright!

You're Tarzan!
Captain Kirk maybe.
John Wayne.
Whatever!
That don't impress me much!


So, note for those reading it. Things don't impress me (much). You got a car, money, connections... whatever. Do you have personality? Tact? Grace? Social skills? Humble? Maturity? Sweetness? Because money can't replace any of these things. And the girls, the really good ones, won't give a flying fig about the car you drive. They'll more care if you make them feel safe, loved, beautiful, and needed. I have yet to meet the guy that can make me feel safe in social situations, usually I sit there and cringe at the things that fly out of their mouths and hope no one holds it against me. 

So you're Benedict Cumberbatch?
Whatever!
That don't impress me much. 
(Well, actually it would, because that would be freaking sweet to meet him, although we probably wouldn't really hit it off, on account of him being almost 20 years older than me and stuff... Maybe that actually explains what I mean about it better than anything.) 

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