The Computer Lady

I was at the library today and I was reminded of how some people react when things aren't going their way. Here's a basic idea of what happened.

I sat down at a computer to do some typing to my missionary siblings. Things were going pretty good, when suddenly my chair is jolted by a lady tripping over me. How she failed to see me I am not sure, but she tripped and started to fall. As she was about to smack face-first into the printer, I did the (gentlemanly?) lady-like thing and caught her, asking if she was okay. In return, I was given a massive glare and was shaken off. This lady then plopped her stuff down at the computer next to mine and started 'working' at a furious pace.

I decided to watch this strange creature. She was pacing back and forth behind her computer, and every once in awhile would lean forward and type furiously on the keyboard. The computer would respond with an <error> message and a stubborn beep. At this she would swear at the computer, and resume pacing while shuffling through a huge sheaf of papers. This repeated two or three times.

After the third time she attacked the computer and got the same response, I was so intrigued that I couldn't help but ask if she needed any help.
Me: "Excuse me, can I help...?"
Angry Computer Lady: *Poisonous Look*
Me: Alrighty then, I'll just be invisible for awhile...

This is almost an exact representation.

She continued to alternate between swearing, typing, and madly shuffling through papers. After a bit I divined that she was trying to get something to print. A quick glance at her screen told me that she was setting it up as a fax document instead of a word document, and the poor abused computer couldn't make sense of her demands. I debated offering to help her one more time and risk dying of evil glares, but at that moment she stormed off to the information desk to bring back a long-suffering librarian. The librarian was, of course, able to fix it, and the crazy computer lady madly printed off several papers, gathered them up, and in a flurry of awkwardness and pervasive stress, dissapeared.

Whew, glad she's gone. I thought, Now I'll just finish typing and go on pinterest for a bit...
I'm used to strange people, the world is peppered with them and I seem to encounter more than my fair share. I thought this was just the latest in a string of strange encounters. However, little did I know this encounter was not yet complete.

10 minutes later, the crazy computer lady returned, and this time actually sat down on my other side. She opened up the computer, and then proceeded to mutter swear words under her breath as she furiously clicked away. A few unsuspecting boys came in, seeking a past-time of computer games. Little did they know, crazy computer lady was there to stay. These two innocent blonde kids started whispering furiously about the latest MMORPG they were involved in, trading hints and secrets as they shared a computer. They were down the row from my own and the crazy computer lady's area, but that didn't stop her from rising and hissing at them. "SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Everyone in the entire library was silenced by the echoing of crazy computer lady's hiss. The two boys retreated into their shells, throwing glances at her that seemed to say, Harry Potter is right, grown-ups are wicked mad and can't be trusted. 
The crazy computer lady then resumed working, seemingly unaware that her swearing was louder than the boy's whispers had ever been. Much worse for the ears too.

At that point I'd had enough, I scrapped my work for the day and gathered myself up and out the door. You are expected to put up with a certain amount of crazy in public areas, but this was ridiculous. Not harmless ridiculous like the guy on the bus that wears stuffed anime characters pinned to his hat, but drunk guy hanging around the supermarket dangerous ridiculous. She had absolutely no clue of how she was appearing to the people around her, so caught up in her whirlwind of real or imagined stresses that she was permeating the entire building with bad attitude.

I thought about that on the way home, few people are as unaware of their self-image as to be that rude. It was also interesting to me that she refused offers of help, choosing instead to bring other people into her stress and angst instead of letting it be solved. Then, I found some peaches and cream and forgot about it.

HOWEVER....
Next morning I popped down to the library. As I don't have a computer, I have to use the library for all my work, including typing this. If you remember, I also didn't have a chance to finish my missionary letters. I sat down and guess who walks in not 10 minutes later. Crazy computer lady, as full of vitrol and swearing as she had been the previous evening. She swore at her computer, clumsily banged into things, and told off an unsuspecting patron who had the audacity to answer a phonecall in her vicinity. It was then that I decided to take action, and penned this note:

Dear Angry Computer Lady,
I noticed you here at the library last night and you seemed rather upset. I don't think you noticed me, but you tripped over me once and when I offered to help, you pretended you hadn't heard. I'm sorry you're having such a bad day. I also couldn't help but notice that you hushed everyone around you, but then kept swearing at your computer. 
How about this, I'll help you out with your computer problems next time I see you, and you don't hush people in public and put a lid on the swearing. I'm also going to just leave this note and run, because I'm worried you'll glare at me again. Don't worry, I'll come back on a less stressful day. 
Just want you to know, it's going to be okay and there are people who do notice and want to help. 
It gets better,
Sincerely,
Quiet Computer Girl

Halfway through the writing of this, crazy computer lady got up and left, quite suddenly. If she returns I'll give this to her, but if not, that's okay.

And just so you all know, watch your thoughts, actions, and words. You never know who is watching and what sort of effect you are having on them!

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give
the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  Nothing could be closer to the truth.  But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn't have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on.  No, it won’t be easy.  There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  We aren't supposed to be able to instantly solve problems.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself.  Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.  Read The Road Less Traveled.
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.  Yes, help others; but help yourself too.  If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing.  Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success.  You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
   
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us.  We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.  Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive.  But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either.  You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.  Read Stumbling on Happiness.
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn't even there in the first place.  Evaluate situations and take decisive action.  You cannot change what you refuse to confront.  Making progress involves risk.  Period!  You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely.  It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.  There’s no need to rush.  If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn't work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.  Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.  But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.  Concentrate on beating your own records every day.  Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.  Ask yourself this:  “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curve balls are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you.  You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough.  But reflect back on those negative curve balls thrown at you in the past.  You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation.  So smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart.  You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!  And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too.  If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
    
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway.  Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.  The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn't reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.  Read Getting Things Done.
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Don’t take the easy way out.  Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn't. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well.  You shouldn't be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out.  But making one person smile CAN change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy.  One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time?  Three years?  Five years?”  If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.